I just got done reading an article on parenting magazine and it became clear to me that I’m am a helicopter parent. My 5 yr old started at his designated school (3 min walk) and on the first day I decided to switch him to another school because I wasn’t happy with the demographics at that school. I got into the other school which it was great, but kept feeling guilty about my decision and the reasons for leaving so I switch him back. This all happened within a couple of months. Now, here I’m trying to make a decision for next year and I’m not sure what to do. I think my feelings remain the same regarding demographics and I’m not sure if that is enough reason for me to switch him again? Please help!
L, in CO
Stop looking at the school around your child, and start looking at your child in the school.
Is he thriving? Is he suffering? If he is suffering in some way, is it teaching him something valuable?
What is the purpose of your child’s education?
Kids don’t go to school to be happy. They don’t go to school so parents can be happy. Kids go to school to learn, and to grow. As you move forward in your decision-making, try asking yourself these questions:
- Is he learning?
- Does he have the opportunity to solve problems?
- Do his teachers know him?
- Is he growing?
- Will he leave this school a stronger, more capable person?
If the answer to any (or most) of these questions is no, you might need a different school. Before you fill out those change-of-school forms, though, try to solve the problems where he is.
Does he need help? Talk to his teachers, his principal, the guidance counselor and try to get that help.
Does the school need more resources? Go see your school board and agitate for those changes. If that doesn’t work, call a reporter!
Ask yourself what your child can learn by your actions. Can you show him some problem solving? Can you keep him focused on learning and growing wherever he finds himself? Or do you need to teach him that a very bad situation requires flexibility and change?
I don’t know where he should go to school, but you do.
Parents, how do you decide if it’s time for a school change?
