Of the eight Resilience Skills (the things you do to help you navigate change more easily) the one that would - based on your responses - be most useful to you right now is build connections.

Build connections:

You are facing something alone, and it doesn’t have to be that way. Change is easier to navigate when you reach out to someone in your network for a little strength. Increase and use your connections.

Two strategies you could use to strengthen your ability to build connections are:

1. Ask for a roadmap. Write down the top 3 emotions you are experiencing. Make a list of 3 people you know who’ve been through something where they faced one or more of those same strong emotions and handled it in a way you admire. Reach out to one of those people today (text, phone, DM, email) and ask if they’d be willing to tell you how they got through that time.
2. Proximity. You can get support from someone without telling them anything you’re experiencing. Pick someone who makes you feel good just to be around and call them to hang out. You don’t even need to explain why.

Setting boundaries:

You’re navigating something that is a challenge for you, but it’s even harder when you feel like you have to be the main support for so many others. Set some boundaries so that you can handle this the best way you can.

Two strategies you could use to strengthen your ability to set boundaries are:

1. Say what you need. Think of one person you can completely trust. Reach out to tell them one thing you could use to support you right now AND that you don’t want to say more about what you’re going through just yet.
2. Who doesn’t need you? Write down all the adults you are trying to support through this change. Circle those who have another support person in their lives. Reach out to one of them today and let them know that you are not sure you can give them all the support they need, but you’re grateful they also have that other person in their life to help.

Of the eight Resilience Skills (the things you do to help you navigate change more easily) the one that would - based on your responses - be most useful to you right now is open to change.

Open to change:

When you can only picture one or two outcomes of a situation it’s harder to feel resilient. Open to a few different possibilities and prepare yourself well for them so that you can be ok no matter what happens.

Two strategies you could use to strengthen your ability to become open to change are:

1. What if it didn’t turn out the way you hope? Consider the possible outcomes. Which three are most likely? What can you do to prepare for the two you weren’t hoping for right now?
2. Downgrade the urgency. Right now this feels like the most impactful thing happening in your life. Make a short list of your top priorities in life. Is there something you could do right now to help or support one of those goals that would make the difficulty you’re facing feel smaller?

Of the eight Resilience Skills (the things you do to help you navigate change more easily) the one that would - based on your responses - be most useful to you right now is manage discomfort.

Managing discomfort:

While you are facing a challenging situation you may find it gets harder because you’re using negative coping mechanisms like lashing out at others or not being able to enjoy things you normally do. Use a strategy to manage your discomfort while you are navigating what’s happening or waiting for the next step.

Two strategies you could use to strengthen your ability to manage discomfort are:

1. This Not That. What is something you’re doing right now because of this stressor that you wish you weren’t? Now think of three things you have done in the past that made you feel better but weren't risky or damaging? Make a list on paper or your phone called “This Not That” and write down the healthier behaviors that can replace the thing you’re currently doing.
2. Use your ears. Go to your music app (or album collection) and find a song that relieves your feelings right now. Now get online and search “songs like _____” and see if you can create a playlist of songs to relieve your current stress.

Of the eight Resilience Skills (the things you do to help you navigate change more easily) the one that would - based on your responses - be most useful to you right now is setting goals.

Setting goals:

To navigate a change and come through it whole and healthy, you have to know what result you want. Setting goals - or reminding yourself of your goals - makes you stronger in the face of change.

Two strategies you could use to strengthen your ability to set goals are:

1. Why does this situation matter? Whatever change you are facing, which of your own goals does it connect to the most? And, if this change happens in a way you don’t want, how can you reach your goal anyway?
2. How could this help? Is there a silver lining to this change that could impact where you want to be in life in a good way?

Of the eight Resilience Skills (the things you do to help you navigate change more easily) the one that would - based on your responses - be most useful to you right now is finding options.

Finding options:

 In the face of any new situation, you have choices to consider. The more options you think of before you make a decision, the less likely you are to feel stuck when one doesn’t work out the way you hoped.

Two strategies you could use to strengthen your ability to find options are:

1. Three choices. Before you decide how to approach your challenge next, force yourself to think of three possibilities, not only one. Even if you’re sure you know what will work, come up with two other options just in case that first one doesn’t turn out the way you hope.
2. Google that! Go online and search for “________________ (your issue) options” You’re likely to find a lot of possibilities that don’t work for you, but you may find an idea that will help!

Of the eight Resilience Skills (the things you do to help you navigate change more easily) the one that would - based on your responses - be most useful to you right now is taking action.

Take action:

When a change comes along it’s easy to feel stuck. You can think of everything you might do but how are you supposed to know which would be best? Taking action is actually the best way to get through, even when it makes you uncomfortable. Here are a couple of ways to get yourself to do that.

Two strategies you could use to strengthen your ability to take action are:

1. Pick one thing. Make a list - really, write it down - of a few things you could do in regards to the situation you’re facing. Even if you don’t like all the options, write down everything you can think of that might improve your experience or the outcome. Now pick the easiest one and write down when this week you will do it. Put it in your calendar, set an alarm and tell someone else your plan. Or just do it.
2. Stop expecting perfection. Are you putting a lot of pressure on yourself to wait until you have the perfect solution to the situation? Don’t do that! You don’t have to have the exact right answer, you just need to take an action that seems reasonably likely to move things forward right now without doing major harm.

Of the eight Resilience Skills (the things you do to help you navigate change more easily) the one that would - based on your responses - be most useful to you right now is persevering.

Perseverance:

We often hear “just keep swimming” but it can be frustrating and hard to do that. Take one or both of these strategies to build your strength and ability to persevere.

Two strategies you could use to strengthen your ability to persevere are:

1. When will it end? How long do you think it will be until this situation resolves? Now consider that it might take a few months longer than you think. Instead of crawling across an arbitrary finish line, think about how you could build your endurance in this situation. What do you need to do or ask for in order to keep going?
2. But it should work! Is there something you’re trying in this situation that you really think should be helping but it isn’t? If you tried again, what is one thing you could change about your approach to give it a better chance of success?