Much of my work focuses on strategies that build resilience. One focus is the strategies we can use to help other people navigate change when they’re struggling, and one of those strategies is empathy.
Empathy is a really useful strategy to help others find their resilience… IF.
IF this is someone who trusts you.
And, if this someone who trusts you is also able to use that empathy to take a step forward towards their goal.
Often, though, we use empathy as a box to check, proof to ourselves that we’re good people rather than as a strategy to aid someone else’s success.
When I teach people about empathy we talk about the difference between empathy and helping. When your goal is to strengthen someone so that they can move themselves forward, empathy can be a really useful tool. When you want to assist someone – especially someone you’ve just met or don’t know personally – action is just as valuable as empathy. And empathy without action can be an empty gesture.
The gap between empathy felt and action taken, when we are focused on communities at risk or groups of people who have suffered a tragedy, leads to more suffering, not less. In m own quest to feel and express empathy I find I let myself off the hook about making a tangible difference in other people’s lives. In the words of one of you wise people in this community, it seems people feel “like they can just post on social media and that is “taking action” when we are at a time (in my opinion anyway) when we need to actually stand up and actually do things IRL.”
I see myself in that and want to close the gap between empathy and action. How do you put your own empathy into action?
All my best,
Dr. G
