Yesterday I learned something powerful and I want to share it with you.
On the Think Tank on Resilience (are you signed up for it? It’s a great community), I asked Scott Livesay, who is concurrently the CEO of two multimillion dollar companies, “What do you do personally when you notice that your resilience is dropping?”
He explained that he will make a list of all his priorities, and then divide them into three categories. The first is high priority, has to have his attention stuff. The next is stuff that is really important but someone else could do as well (or better) and he can delegate. The third – and this is the one that blew my mind a little – is stuff he can pause.
OK, maybe this was obvious to you. If so, awesome. I’ll see myself out. But if, like me, you’re really pondering this? Let me explain why I’m so intrigued.
Postponement is a topic I’ve been learning and leading about for the past few months, in the area of stress response and self-regulation. Postponement has great benefits – and I’ll talk about that next week – for our mental health. This – what Scott does with his to do list – is a benefit I hadn’t considered.
What if we could all decide that, when competing priorities or unexpected challenges arise, we should decide what to pause? Not give up, not walk away from, just put on hold and reevaluate? Scott says he gets back to that list every 90 days or so. I would definitely have to set an alarm in my calendar to do that.
Well I’m in. I’m going to take three things from my to do list and put them on a new “look at it in 90 days” list.
- Making a photo album for my family for 2024
- Figuring out life and disability and long-term care insurance
- Helping my 16 year old redecorate his room
All those things matter to me, they are all part of who I mean to be… but they can pause.
How about you? What’s on your list or in your head as a “oh, I really keep meaning to do that” action?
Can you pause a few and stop wasting energy feeling less than about them? Because that is the resilience advantage in this exercise – knowing that you’re not behind, you’ve made a decision to postpone.
All my best,
Dr. G
